Trepidation

We've all been there. At least those of us who have been overweight for any amount of time in our lives. We've all felt anxiety over stepping outside of our normal routines and comfort zones to do something different and potentially embarrassing or humiliating.
For me, the trepidation comes from envisioning my upcoming trip to an indoor water park with the family. In 5 days, my family (minus our 10 month old daughter who is staying with Grandma) is taking a short trip to Sandusky, Ohio to spend two days at Kalahari resort. There, we'll have 2 days to play in the HUGE indoor water park there. We've been there before, year and a half ago. I was pregnant then, so my anxiety was lessoned slightly because my weight was somewhat hidden by my bulging pregnant belly. My pregnancy was also an excuse not to have to do the more active and potentially embarrassing activities like going down the water slides.
This year I have no such excuses. My 11 year old daughter is looking forward to doing those things with me this time, and I can't even imagine what people are going to think of me awkwardly trying to fit in the inflatable tubes and flopping out at the end of the water slide looking completely awkward and unnatural. I wish I was in better shape so that I could have more energy and more flexibility and ultimately more confidence to enjoy myself at places like these. Not to mention the discomfort at having to wear a size 26 bathing suit in public.

The silver lining to this is that I'm moving in the right direction right now. I am two weeks into my eating plan with encouraging success and minimal speed bumps along the way so far. I feel positive, and I have a goal of 70 lbs in 8 months, with my 15 year high school reunion as a huge motivating factor for me at the end of that 8 months. I am determined to make this change, to stick with it and see it through. Next year when we visit Kalahari again, I will be much thinner and in much better shape!